I have a
confession. I hate commitments. Personal or professional, it doesn't matter. I
like knowing that I have an escape plan, a way out. It's not so bad in my
personal life. If someone doesn't like it, they are free to walk away. But in
the professional world, it's a career killer. Wondering why I haven't blogged
in nearly two years? Curious as to why it's been nearly a year since I
published anything under my own name, and over six months since I published
anything at all? Lack of commitment. I'd love to blame my day job - and I often
do - but that is something I could always leave, if I were willing to commit.
I always,
ALWAYS, hedge my bets. And while it makes me feel safe, it also means I have
very little to show for my efforts. Sales are slowing down now. And because I
didn't commit to anything in 2012, I have no new material to help boost them.
January will be the first month in over a year that I won't get paid any
royalties. And that stings.
So it's
time to change.
I'm
miserable when I'm not producing fiction. But before I quit my job and dive
into the lifestyle of a working writer, it's time to assess what I want to
accomplish, and then <gasp!> commit to a plan that will help me succeed.
I'd like
to see myself doing 5000 words a week. 50 weeks a year. 250,000 total new words
of fiction in 2013. At the speed I write, that is only 5-10 hours a week.
Can I do
it? Maybe. With 55 hours taken up by my day job and commute, I'm already facing
a tall order. Add in time spent editing, maybe 15-20 hours a week, and it
becomes even more daunting. Maybe the goal is too high. For sure I'm going to
be tired more days than not, even before I try to write. When will I see my
family? What about...
There.
See how easy it was to almost talk myself out of it? Sneak Preview: I bet I
fight the same battle, with the same arguments, every time I sit down to write
in 2013. But I will try to persevere. Likely I will fail on all fronts. And
fail big. I'll be lucky to get half the words down that I say I'll write. I
hope I fail so hard. Because you know what? Even if I only make it halfway to
my goal in 2013, that'll still be 125,000 new words that I write. At my average
length, that's one novel and more than a half-dozen short stories. I'll take
it.
So here's
to committing, whether to success or failure, in 2013. Happy New Year.
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